The Speaker 19: Krosis

• Posted by Clement Bilhorn February 10, 2013 - 813 views

  I'm in Sovngarde.

  

  Yes, it's beautiful. It being the home for dead Noses doesn't change that. After all, Noses have beautiful noses, so there's no reason their heaven can't be the same way.

  But stunning as it all is, the sweetness of the air, the whisper of cold flowers, the gleaming of celestial lights, I'm not here to sight-see. 

  

  I'm here to kill my brother.

  

  I meet a Stormcloak, wandering lost in the mist. He tells me how he met his end at the tip of an arrow. It might have been mine that sent him there. But even though he's willing to forgive the past and fight with me today, the brief hope I provide is not enough.

  

  The mist closes for a second, I hear Alduin roar, and the man is gone, devoured, never to enjoy the reward for which he lived his life.

  But if I was unsure of my role in his death, I'm rather less ambivalent about my role in this one's.

  

  Ulfric is nothing like the man I knew in Skyrim. Gone is the brash, aggressive, pontificating leader, ready to die for a cause he invented. Here instead, even in the sublime beauty of Sovngarde, is this shattered, paranoid wreck, rambling about the inevitable doom that will take us all. Is this what happens to the proud when they are brought low? 

  The next person I meet seems made to test exactly that, for he insists I prove my valor before I can meet with the heroes of Sovngarde.

  

  I'm glad it's only valor these Noses value, because I'm sorely lacking in other virtues. Just ask Vittoria and Anoriath.

  

  And so to no surprise of mine, I push aside this guardian and gain the access I seek. I suppose at this point, weird as it strikes me, I may have to let up on my dislike for the Noses. After all, I'm a dragon, and far more of my kind have killed far more of theirs. I can hardly posture myself as their moral superior at this point.

  

  So all in all, it's been a most peculiar afternoon.

  The heroes I seek await within the Hall, and are all too eager to test themselves against Alduin once more, even though they've had quite a lot of time to think about it.

  

  But let it never be said that the dockworker-dragon turns away an offer to help, unless the person offering is clearly in the way of a well-placed arrow. But as big as Alduin is, I'm not worried.

  

  So we clear away the mist, making it clear to Alduin that we are not just here to moan and complain like Ulfric down there. We are here to challenge him, to destroy him, once and for all. 

  And so when Alduin finally makes himself party to the fight, I'm saddened by how swiftly he falls.

  

  Brother, what have you become?

  

  I'm sent out from Sovngarde, and not a moment too soon. Regardless of whatever Tsun and the others says, I don't think Sovngarde is what awaits me in the end. Nocturnal already has a claim to me, and Molag Bal before that. Sure, I freed myself from Molag Bal's control, so maybe I can do so for the others, but I'm not even sure that's what I want. I am a dragon, after all. I think my soul is satisfied in more than endless demonstrations of "valor".

  I think we dragons are called to more, meant for more. We must be--what other sort of beings would engage in the darkest dirge of lament for even the worst of their kind? Dragons are complicated beings. We fight with words and speak with combat. We destroy our enemies while regretting that they were ever enemies in the first place. 

  I leave the mountain in a bleak mood, slouching despondently toward Sky Haven to meet with Lisin and the others, to tell them what happened. It's taken me no time to understand what Paarthurnax meant when he said that melancholy is an easy trap for a Dovah to fall into.

  Which is why I'm genuinely glad to see Lisin, glad in a pure, simple way. I don't need her for anything--I'm just happy to see her.

  Because she's the one part of this that has stayed constant throughout, the one person who hasn't manipulated me or been manipulated by me. Sure, she was pushy, but she was direct. Honest. I can appreciate that. And she'll always be there, keeping me grounded even as everything around me changes. So we say goodbye, but I know it's not for long.

  

  My meeting with Delphine is less happy.

  She tells me that Paarthurnax must die. I'm stunned. "But he helped us," I say. Delphine is uncompromising. The Blades exist to kill dragons, and there can't be any loose ends left. I shake my head--if Paarthurnax really tries to do what Alduin did, then I'll kill him then. Then, and no sooner. If all dragons are such a threat, then why don't the Blades kill me?

  Delphine stares at me. "You're either with us, or against us." 

  Easiest choice I ever made.