The Dockworker 32: A Bad Lizard Goes to War

• Posted by Clement Bilhorn July 28, 2012 - 479 views

  I return to Rikke--she's pleased with the information I have and tells me it's time to assault the Stormcloaks' fort in the Rift. It's a beautiful morning as I head out, ready to bring war to this peaceful land.

  

  Okay, it's really not that peaceful--after the Stormcloaks are gone, the Legion is still going to have this dragon issue on hand. Yes, I'm sure that they'll be paying me to help kill dragons once this is all over, but that's not a long-term issue. We need to find where they live...

  

  ...and slay them!
  
  Granted, these kind of opportunities don't come often. And I'm certainly the only person in Skyrim who could have pulled that off.

  

  But I suppose that's one less dragon. I've never seen them breeding with each other, so maybe there's a fixed amount. Kill one, they don't come back, all's good. They'll be gone eventually. 

  On my way to meet up with the Legion soldiers, I pass by the Stormcloak camp. They immediately ready their weapons and give me their best threatening glances. I do the same, scowling at them and baring my fangs. Neither of us takes the hint since, well, we can't see each other's faces, but I keep moving anyways.

  

  The Legion gives me the option of going with them or going it alone. So of course I go it alone. Clumsy oafs.

  

  I also discover that this puny outpost is not, in fact, the sum total of the Stormcloak forces in the Rift. So that's disappointing. 

  But hey, nothing like seeing an old friend and budding chauvinist to boost my spirits, right? 

  

  He doesn't quite recognize me underneath all the layers of fabric and awesome, but that's okay--I'm just here to kill Stormcloaks. 

  Unfortunately, my orders dictate that I don't charge into the fortress by myself. I have no idea why, but I suspect it's because if it doesn't look like the Legion took the fortress, the Stormcloaks won't give it up so easily. The fortress's taking needs to be more symbolic than simply falling to a reptilian vampire daedra servant.

  

  So night falls and I do the thing where I went to Rikke.

  

  I also meet another thief. These people would have such easier lives if they learned to keep on walking when they see someone who looks way scarier than they do. I mean, I beat people with a lit torch. And vampires are supposed to be scared of fire.

  

  So the attack on the fortress gets underway in short order. Better run, Stormcloaks--the vampire's coming.

  

  This battle is much easier than the last--it's at night. So now not only am I not gasping for breath after every swing and block, I'm also using my enchanted blade to keep myself in the fight. I never have to back down, not once.

  

  The archers are still a problem, though, so I'm careful not to get complacent. My race didn't evolve scales to block arrows.

  Then again, why did they evolve them? I don't feel particularly advantaged by the fact that I'm covered in bony growths. If we evolved with swords on our hands or, say, wings and fire-breath, then we'd be getting somewhere.

  

  So we take Riften. Hooray! I run back to Solitude to change one of the lags before General Tullius gets a chance.
  
  Suck on that, Stormcloaks. I have more flags than you.