Seems like everyone agrees about the need of some more gameplay and some pictures. I'll see how well I can fix it sometime after school today. Thanks for the feed back.

Ya, I didn't spend a whole lot of time on the gameplay cause it was getting close to 1 am and I had school, but I am going to be fixing it when I get back. Didn't know about the 24 hour edit period so thanks for saying that. Thanks for the feedback.

Make sure when you post everything is as good as it could possibly be the first time. Spending a lot of time is fine, it tends to make good results. It took me like 1.5 weeks to fully right up my first build. 

Ya, I kind of rushed through the build a bit, but I will be editing it. Thanks for the feed back.

Thank you, so far most people seem to like the story but I agree that i need to do more work on the build itself. Thanks for the feed back.

Thanks for that. Really. I may write a long version going through the full Dawnguard story, but that will take one hell of a long time, though it would be pretty entertaining for me to do. Thanks for the feed back, hope you'll check this out again after I fix up a lot of things.

Like everyone said, awesome story, but it needs more. For instance, explain why you didn't add in Resto. If you notice a good amount of the Dawnguard use restoration, and the new spells for the dawn guard are all restoration spells, made to kill vampires. To save some perks also, it's a good idea to only grab block (1/5) since it doesn't stack like other perks. Also, why wouldn't you use an armored troll as a pet follower? Is it role-play, unneeded, etc.? Just some things to think about also!

I'll put in why I personally chose not to put in restoration, but as for the armored troll, i just kind of figured it would get in the way more than a dog would. I didn't know about the block (5/5) not stacking and i'll put in why i left out restoration or just add a restoration branch for a slightly different path for him. thanks for the feed back, i'm going to be fixing a lot about it soon.